Hello! Today I want to talk about a specific phrase:
“WHEN LIFE GIVES YOU LEMONS, MAKE LEMONADE.”
And how am I gonna do it? By using the scientific process. Because I am bored. You’re welcome. 😉 First, we begin with a question. Then is 2) background research, 3) constructing a hypothesis, 4) experiment, and 5) draw a conclusion. I’ll also leave some final thoughts at the bottom!
What does this phrase mean and what might need further elaboration? Are there any misconceptions?
The phrase essentially means to make the best of what comes your way, which is a good notion. But some people hear it as “When you are given a negative circumstance, you must fix it immediately” or “when looking trouble in the eyes, simply smile and it will go away”. What is often forgotten are the other ingredients in lemonade. For the first misconception, lemonade is not a quick thing to make. So why should we force our issues to be solved with little thought or time? First you have to juice the lemons, then mix the sugar and hot water until it is all melted, then you add the juice, then you let it cool down for a while. Similarly, we have to put work and effort into 1) changing our perception of the “problem” or 2) understanding the issue and moving towards resolving it. It often takes time and patience. As for the second misconception, here’s a thought. If we are using lemons to symbolize our problems, then it should be noted that there is also sugar and water to come. You need to dilute your feelings so that your energy is not so concentrated, allowing you to see more clearly and make an effort to understand other sides and views. You also need to sweetly validate yourself and your feelings even when they are uncomfortable or disproportionate to the situation. Treating yourself well is the first step to solving a problem without letting it destroy you. If you don’t like how you reacted, try to remedy the situation and consider what should be approached differently in the future. Being angry at yourself for being flawed will only make it harder for you to see yourself as a person, intensifying the sourness. Don’t pour lemon juice into a cut. You also need to take some time and cool off to think about your next action. Moving faster is not necessarily better, just… well… faster. But faster doesn’t always mean “more efficient”.
I did background research.
It led me to this woman who I think would trade you lemons for your soul. Also Julius Rosenwald is probably who said it first.
Next is constructing a hypothesis!
So if lemons are symbolizing problems, it makes sense that lemons all look slightly different. Because problems are different for different people. But then, would each lemonade taste different? Not necessarily. There’s a few routes we can take when we’re given a lemon. 1) Make something with it, 2) ask for help, 3) let it rot and keep hurting you, 4) become it’s victim and blame all your negative behaviors on the lemon, or 5) hide it in your mortal enemy’s house so it will attract fruit flies as it rots but will never smell bad so they wonder where the flies are coming from and will slowly go insane. That’s a solid five options, right? So maybe not everyone’s lemonade tastes the same. Maybe they aren’t even making lemonade; maybe it’s cake. Or pie. Or chicken. Etc. Everyone handles situations differently than the next, and so the outcomes vary. But in general, most people are doing the best they can/know how to do, so the phrase is relatable. It just glosses over some of the random crackhead elaboration that I like. 🙂
Time to test with an experiment!!
OK DON’T GET LEMIN JUICE IN UR EYES!! IT HURTSS SO BAD!!
EXPIRIMENTS OVVHER
Conclusion?
Don’t judge a person for reacting differently than you would have. Even if your suggestion would make more sense logically, oftentimes we deal with things emotionally. So peoples actions might seem screwed up… until you’re really in their shoes. Please also note that where there are hurt feelings, there is frequently pride at risk. So what might seem like a terrible choice could just be someone trying to protect themselves. When everything has been taken away from you, sometimes you have to choose between justice and your pride. For some that is easy. For some it is not. There are always variables in people’s behavior that don’t add up logically.
In the end, we were not all given the same lemons and we did not all make lemonade. If both of you were handed a scary experience, you might walk out laughing with a crazy story to tell your friends. They might walk out traumatized and confused. And honestly, it’s really none of your business to tell them what they should have done. Because 9/10 times, they will leave knowing what to do or what NOT to do in the future. But they can’t go back and change the past, so your suggestions only feel critical and hurtful. If they ask, that’s great. If they don’t, just leave them be. One day we will learn how to handle our lemons.
Let’s just hope that life doesn’t change course and start giving us oranges.
Some random lemony thoughts I had while writing:
At the end of the day… there’s many ways a lemon can change a person. And there’s many ways a person can change a lemon.
Tell me, which is the better hunter? A shark or a lion? They can’t be logically compared because they are not the same. Their tactics, intelligence, circumstances, and basic instincts are different. Such is also true of us in the face of fear, trouble, hardships and heartbreak.
Don’t assume they act sour out of choice; sometimes it’s just because they don’t know another way.
There is no one-size-fits-all for handling/healing from difficult situations.
A lemon is sour. What you do with it might make it taste sweet. But that doesn’t change the fact that the lemon itself is sour. Good things can come from bad situations; but that does not make the situation any less bad.
So don’t judge a dessert for it’s ingredients. And don’t judge a person for what they’ve been through.
Sometimes you can find the good while still feeling the bad, if you look hard enough. But other times you just have to make it through the night for the sun to shine again.
♡, Shortie
